


Golden Funds

by MrMeh



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Inspired by Totally real overwatch facts, Medals, Moira gives up, Moira is best DPS, Money, Reaper losing sanity, Rushkow, Sombra tries her best, Team Talon (Overwatch), That thing in the vents - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 08:08:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22846918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrMeh/pseuds/MrMeh
Summary: Reaper finds out that Talon is broke because of a certain hacker, and has no idea how to fix it.Luckily, Moira has the answer.
Relationships: Reaper | Gabriel Reyes & Sombra | Olivia Colomar
Comments: 8
Kudos: 15





	Golden Funds

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Totally real overwatch facts. So thanks to them :)  
> Real Overwatch Fact #673, to be exact. Go check it out!

Talon was broke.

Reaper was surprised, to say the least. After doing all of Talon's taxes, as usual, he was surprised to find that there was a sudden drop in how much they were making. Sure, maybe killing, stealing, robbing and blackmailing people wasn't always the most steady source of income, but that was usually enough to get by. That, and the monthly donations Akande's mother would drop off, claiming that 'She was so proud of her son and his little friend group'. _So why the sudden drop?_ He thought to himself. _Unless, someone was spending way more then they should-_

_Wait._ He faintly remembered when Sombra mentioned to him that she would be 'borrowing some money from Talon indefinitely' as she put it. He had demanded that she tell him what she was using it for at the time, but she simply responded with "I dunno man, we're in the middle of watching Love Actually, you aren't exactly in a position to make demands." before shrugging and translocating out of the room. _Damn,_ _she_ _had him there_ _._

And so, after sneaking into her ridiculously messy room and stealing her translocator, he called Sombra into his office and sat her down. He was going to get to the bottom of this, one way or another. He sighed, taking his reading glasses off his mask and began talking.

"So, Sombra." She looked nervous.

"Before we start, is this about that thing in the vents? 'Cause I was gonna call someon-"

"Wait, what?"

"Nothing! I'd never hide anything from you! Totally!" She said, visibly nervous. He squinted his eyes at her suspiciously, only to realise she couldn't see his eyes through his mask and he was acting like an idiot.

"Whatever. I just need to know what you did with the money, then you can go. Probably. Unless it's something stupid. Then I'll probably kill you first." He crossed his arms, leaning back into his chair.

"Why? It wasn't _that_ much." Reaper sat still. "Unless we're poor. Are we poor?" She raised an eyebrow. "We're poor, aren't we?"

"Yep."

"Well, why didn't you say that before?" She suddenly shot out of her chair. "Wait, that damn subscription's gonna keep taking our money! Are we gonna be poor for a year??!" Now it was Reaper's turn to jump out of his chair.

"WHAT?! Sombra, what did you do?!" He face palmed, almost knocking his mask off in the process. "Look, can't you just, I don't know, cancel it or something?"

"That's not how subscriptions work, Gabe! What are you, 50?"

"Almost 60, actually. Now, this might be a good time to explain yourself!" He tried hiding the anger in his voice, but failed miserably. That made him sound pretty dumb, actually.

"Well, I- Wait, 60? Damn, you could be my dad!" She laughed.

"Sombra..." He growled.

"Well, I guess that thing in the vents can make itself comfortable, assuming we can't afford to pay someone to get rid of it." She shrugged. Which was totally uncool, because that's his thing! He slammed his hands on his desk, Phoenix Wright style.

"The money, Sombra! I swear, if you've spent it on something stupid!"

"Alright, I'll admit it, I might have done stupid stuff-"

Sombra was interrupted by a series of knocks at the door. They both turned to look at it, clearly annoyed. Satan himself could probably be on the other side of that door, and they'd probably yell in his face.

"WHAT?!" The two shouted in unison. Sombra readied herself to yell jinx, only to realise that would probably be the last thing she'd ever say. Reaper's tone told her that much.

"Hmm. Perhaps another time, then." Came the voice from behind the door, containing a distinct Irish accent.

"What do you want, Moira?!" Reaper yelled at the door. 

After a few moments of awkward silence, the door creaked open, and in entered Moira. Well, she _tried_ to enter anyways, as it looked like she was using all of her strength trying to drag a large sack across the ground, huffing and puffing with every step. Her general appearance was quite messy and unkempt, very unlike the scientist, who was normally spotless. She smelled like potatoes and regret. She walked up to Sombra and placed the sack next to her, catching her breath.

"Well, I couldn't help but notice a... Certain lack of funds being placed into my lap." All three of Moira`s 'eyebrows' lowering in frustration. _Huh. Weird._ She pointed at Sombra.

"And I bet _this_ one had something to do with it, hmm?" Moira stuck a thumb at her. Sombra rolled her eyes and sighed, before effortlessly picking up the sack and dropping it on top of Reaper`s desk.

"I get it," Sombra said. "You all think I`m immature, act like a child-"

"Well, you`ve done nothing to disprove our claims." Moira stated matter of factually. While Reaper did agree with the mad woman, he was starting to get impatient.

"Well, at least I don't spend all of my time watching animated cartoon shows! Like a kid!"

"Enough. The pair of you." Reaper pointed at Moira. "You. Get to the point. I was about to give myself a valid reason to kick Sombra`s ass, and I`d like to get back to that." He looked at Sombra, who looked like she was ready to bolt out the open door at any moment.

"Why, Gabriel." He winced at Moira`s mention of his old name. "While I wouldn`t miss that for the world, I believe I have a solution to our newly found financial crisis. Thanks for that Sombra, by the way." Sombra looked away, not wanting to look either of the angry elders in the eye. 

"Huh. Must be a pretty good solution if it`s going to undo all the damage Sombra`s done." Reaper shrugged.

"I believe so." She gestured towards the sack that sat on his desk.

Reaper, not wanting to waste anymore of his precious time, leaned over the sack and put his hand in. He felt around and grabbed the first thing he felt. It was round and heavy. He pulled out his hand only to find...

...A golden medal sat in his hand.

_What._ He opened up the sack to find even more gold medals sat inside. At least thirty, he assumed. These could be worth so much if given to the right buyer...

So many thoughts flew through his head. _How? Why? Since when was Moira some kind of Olympic athlete? She could barely carry the sack in the room! What-_

He looked over at Sombra, only to notice a mischievous grin was creeping onto her face. It was at that moment that Reaper immediately decided that Sombra wouldn`t be able to even look at these when they were done here, let alone touch them. He put the medal in his hand on the desk with care, (he was pretty sure that was the first time he`d done something with care in a while) and turned to look at Moira.

"Ok. I`m going to need an explanation from both of you. Fast." Reaper sat back in his chair and folded his arm, expecting a reply. The smug expression was wiped of Sombra`s face.

"Both of us? What did I do now? I didn`t even know about this!" She yelled at him. He raised a brow.

"What`s with that face? What are you planning?" He knew Sombra well, well enough to know that she had an idea. Maybe she thought it would be fun to mess with Talon even more. Not like he`d let her.

"If I may interject," Moira stepped towards the desk, and gestured towards the medals. "I won these medals during missions. All of which, I was accompanied by Sombra." She turned to face the hacker. "So, if that is the case, what did you win?" 

"Well- I- Uh..." Sombra`s eyes darted around the room. "Uhh.....Here!" She reached into one of her pockets, pulling out a pink purse. Was that Hello Kitty Reaper saw on the side of it? 

She rummaged through her purse, finding an old picture she had snapped. It was her in a bar with a passed out McCree, who had either got spiked, or had been incredibly stupid, drinking past his limits. Still, it was a fun evening for the both of them, and gave Sombra a nice piece of blackmail. She rummaged around some more, before pulling out something and quickly handing it to Reaper. He stared in confusion at the newly acquired item that sat in the palm of his hand.

It was a ribbon, that simply read 'WELL DONE!'. Completely useless to him. But Sombra`s face told a different story, as she beamed at him. He stared at her for a few seconds before throwing it back into her arms, and folded his. A few moments of silence told Sombra it was her cue to speak.

"Well, it`s a ribbon, for coming fifth on that one mission! ...Out of six, heh." She sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck. Moira mouthed something along the lines of 'for what?', to which Sombra replied "Objective time. But hey, at least I beat Widow!".

It was for some odd, weirdly timed reason that at that exact moment, Widowmaker walked past the room and peered through the doorway. She looked tired, like she hadn`t slept in days.

"Hoh, please." Widowmaker said sarcastically, "I was too busy getting so many of these." Before reaching into her nightgown and pulling out a silver medal. She chucked it at full force at Sombra, nailing her on the head and downing her instantly. "You should practice your aim, _fille folle._ I`m sure McCree would appreciate it." Widowmaker walked off, presumably towards her bedroom. Reaper was surprised that Sombra didn`t respond with something witty, only to realise she was too busy sitting uncomfortably on the floor, clutching at her head wound to care. _Damn, Widow has a good throwing arm._

Moira looked at the pathetic sight that lay before her and sighed, before beginning to heal Sombra. She realised she still hadn`t come up with a name for her healing, and should probably get onto doing that. "Moira! Cover me with your healing juices!" Was not something she wanted to hear come out of Akande`s mouth ever again. She turned to look at Reaper, who was currently slumped against his chair, and sighed.

"Come along now," Moira grabbed Sombra by the arm, lifting her off the floor and stood her upright. Despite Sombra's protests, she continued dragging her out of the room by the arm like she were a disobedient child. "Give Gabriel a break. Being in your presence tends to stress people out." She practically shoved Sombra out of the room when she had the chance; Reaper noted Moira looked quite pleased with herself putting her in an uncomfortable situation, perhaps too much so. Moira stopped at the door frame, turning to face him.

"Now that the runt has been dealt with, and I've quite literally dropped gold into your lap, perhaps my department can get an upgrade, hmm?" Reaper nodded. "Good. I'm glad I won't have to resort to stealing household pets again. I still have that crazy Lindholm girl trying to find me..." Moira seemed to be lost in her own thoughts for a moment, before adding a quick "Toodles!" before dissipating into a cloud of mist. _She couldn't even leave a room_ normally...

Reaper decided to weigh out his options, only to realise that he really didn't have any. _Most of Talon were DPS, and their healer was doing better than most of them?_ A thought popped into his head. _More medals = more money = more troops = more power to piss off Jack. Perfect._

Reaper grabbed his phone that sat on his desk. He quickly dialled Akande's number, chuckling with delight as he did so. Before Akande could even start talking, Reaper stopped him in his tracks.

"Akande. Tell your mother to cancel her donation... I've got an idea." 

**Author's Note:**

> "Hey, who put Moira in the DPS catagory?"
> 
> \-----------------------------------------------------
> 
> Psst, here`s Totally Real Overwatch Facts:
> 
> https://real-overwatch-facts.tumblr.com/
> 
> Sooo I got challenged by a friend to write a 2000 word one shot in a week cause I`m slow as hell :/  
> Thanks rushkow :p  
> But now you gotta uphold your half of the bargain :)
> 
> (Ps: If anyone spots any mistakes, let me know)


End file.
